| Strength and Beauty |
Chapter 19 |
Page 5 |
Besides, much of what to us seems fault or blemish is really only an imperfect phase of development in a life. There is an awkward age in many a boy, when it would be most unkind as well as unwise to criticize him; in due time he will pass through it, and will be self possessed and refined in his bearing. Strength of character is usually an evolution, many of whose processes appear very uncouth and faulty. Childhood and youth are always marked at different periods by unlovely features which are really incident to certain stages of growth, and should not be treated as faults. Unripeness and immaturity are not blemishes in their place; in due time they will give place to ripeness and maturity.
But when we do see in our friends faults which are indeed faults, and which we believe we ought to try to cure, we should go about it in love, with prayer, and with wise and gentle tact. A gentle, loving way is better than blurting out the criticism, as some brusque people do, abruptly, calling it frankness, saying that they always honestly say what they believe. It may be honest and frank enough, but it is not the Christ like way. “What did you preach about yesterday?” asked an old clergyman of a young minister, one Monday. “On the judgment,” replied the young man. “Did you do it tenderly?” asked the older pastor. We should never speak to others of their sins and faults unless we can do it tenderly.
We need patience, too, and sometimes we must wait a long time for the opportunity to do our duty in this regard, to speak the right word. But the right occasion will come if we wait for it. Harm is done ofttimes by speaking too soon.
Our Master gives us another important counsel on the subject when he says that we must tell our brother his fault “between him and thee alone.” If we love him we should seal our lips to others concerning his faults and go to him with the matter alone. Then the only way we can ever have a right to tell him of his faults is in the name of Christ and as he would do it if he were in our place.
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